StevanUnvaled™

Ok, so if you’re here and you’re planning to read this page then be prepared to read because it’s really long. It’s 17 years of my life. So, if you do not like reading then you shouldn’t stay.

I guess I should start with when and where I was born. If you’ve read my profile on either MySpace or on here then you’ll know that I was born in Riverside, California at Parkview Hospital. Concidentaly, the same hospital Amy Lee was born at. I was born at 2:32pm on March 20th of 1991. My mother is from Greenville, South Carolina (where I live now.) and my father is from Sunnyvale, California. I lived in Riverside, California for about three years at an apartment complex called Pine Ridge with my mother and my father. My parents were not married until I was about two years old. My father had a bad drug and alcohol addiction, he left me and my mother when I was about three or so.

Once he left us, my mother decided it was time for us to move down here to Greenville, South Carolina. Once we moved down here I pretty much lived my life with my mother, my grandparents, my aunts, and my cousins. Growing up around all the females I had no father figure in my life until I was about 9 or 10 years old.

That was when my mom married my stepfather. Of course like every other child who knows that a man is not his father is going to have some authority issues with him. I didn’t obey him at all I didn’t do what I was told I turned into a rebellious child when it came to him. I eventually got to the point where I actually started to hate him. I didn’t want him in my life and I caused so much pain for my mother that she was back and forth between therapy sessions and marrige counceling with my stepfather.

My dad found out that we had moved back down here, so he decided to also. He started dating this woman who had two other children. My father had somehow convinced my mother that he was well enough and he was turning his life around. Everyone believed him because at that time, yes he was turning his life around. Things got sour between him and his woman. He began drinking again, he started hitting on her in front of her children. She finally left him, and I don’t blame her.

My father moved back in with his stepmother who also lived here in Greenville. I hadn’t seen him in months. Me and my mother and stepfather were living in an apartment in Taylors, South Carolina. A city right outside of Greenville. We lived there for a few years when they decided to get a house. We moved in with my grandparents in Greenville until the house was finished being built.

I lived there with them for a while before things started getting bad between me and my stepfather. Then, the worst thing that could have ever happened to me and the family, did. In January of 2004 my cousin Meghan was diagnosed with Bacterial Meningitis. She died from it on January 9th of 2004. Meghan was my cousin but most of all my best friend. Still to this day, I try not to believe that she’s actually gone.

After she died I went into a state of sever depression. I began dressing extremely gothic. I began to cut myself. Every time deeper and deeper. It was my own personal hidden secret. I never told anyone. Until my mom finally found it on the day that I overdosed on pain killers at school. I ended up going to the hospital and eventually put into a mental clinic for a while. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorer and BPD borderline personality disorder.

I failed the eighth grade because of Meghan’s death; but I was given a second chance. I moved in with my grandparents because I couldn’t live with my stepfather. There was too much going on inside myself that I couldn’t deal with the stress of living with him as well as my own problems. I began doing drugs. I began popping pills and smoking weed. I even tried snorting coke for the first and last time in my life. I was a total wreck. I eventually met this guy, his name was Bobby. He helped me come off of my drug trip a little while afterwards. Thats a whole other story though.

A little before Meghan’s death I started having feelings toward men in an erotic way. Thinking back on it, I actually remember having some of these feelings when I was a child. Once I actually hit my eighth grade year was when I realized that I was gay. I decided to tell someone at school who I thought was my friend at the time, but in the end she just screwed me over just like everyone else did. I became the most hated person at school. Constantly getting beat-up by the jocks and the rednecks and I began to hate them. I started to close off to everyone. I started to hate anyone that wasn’t like me.

Because I had failed the eighth grade the middle school I was going to was doing a pilot program called the “Star Academy” (sounds like a remedial class) which gave anyone who had failed a grade sometime in elementary/middle school a second chance to make it up. They let us take 8th and 9th grade classes there at the middle school which made us gain high school credit along with other classes we took for high school credit, which resulting in the fact that when we finished the “Star Academy” program we would be placed in the 10th grade where we belong.

I went through the program at my middle school only to find out that they wanted me to go to Easley High School the following year. I had a fit. I was not going to Easley High only because everyone that hated me at Gettys Middle was there at Easley and I wasn’t going through the pain and suffereing I had went through all through my middle school years. I finally talked my mother into putting me into Carolina High School and Academy of Pre-Engineering Technology and Health Professions (to make it short we just called it C-Train.) This was my mother’s old high school. She didn’t want me to go here only because it was such a bad school when she went that she thought it would be the same way now.

Well, it wasn’t. I went my 10th grade year and I loved it. I had so many friends and so many thing to do that I never wanted to leave. I loved that school. My grades were good my life was perfect. I ended up meeting this guy at one of the football games. It was a Carolina High Trojans vs. Berea High Bulldogs (yes my high school mascott was a trojan.) His name was Maark. Everyone called him Maark Staar because of his obsession with Jeffree Star.

We began dating in February of my 10th grade year. We dated for about a full year before I found him cheating on me with my best friend from Pickens High. Needless to say I broke up with him. For some reason after we broke up, we somehow stayed friends (don’t know how that happened.) and we still are friends. Towards the end of my 10th grade year things started to go down-hill. I lost contact with most of my friends, and a lot of drama got stared all because of this whore named Brittany Hunt. (AKA: Shitty Kunt.)

Everyone hated Shittney but she thought that everyone loved her. She thought she was just God’s gift to woman kind. But she was sadly mistaken. Eventually things died down with all that. I dated a guy named Anthony for like 30 seconds then we broke up because he was very childish and immature.

One day after school things changed for me. I met this girl namd Natasha (Tasha). From that moment on we became best friends. We did everything together it got to the point where people asked us if we were brother and sister because we were around each other so much. Tasha is the best thing that happend to me.

Around March of 2007 my friend Janee died. I wasn’t really close to her, but it was still really hard. Another girl I knew had passed too her name was Theresa, I didn’t know her too well either. But the one death that got me really bad. The first time I had actually experianced something to tragic since Meghan’s death. Was when my friend Sean was murdered for being gay.

Sean was a very open minded individual. Much like me. He was very accepting and very “out there”. One night in April, he was beat to death at a night club on Pelham Rd. in Greenville just because he was gay. Well, the killer’s name was Stephen Andrew Moller. And because there is NO statute what-so-ever in the state of South Carolina against “gay-related” hate crimes, the guy got off with some community service and some fines. This was the second death I had experianced and it was the first death that actually got to me. Meghan died from a natural cause. To know that Sean was murdered… That really, really gets to me.

The summer passed that year and everything was alright. Not perfect but I still had some good friends that I hung out with all the time, and it was remotly alright. My 11th grade (junior) year in high school wasn’t so great. We got a new principal. EVERYTHING changed. C-Train was not as much fun as it used to be. Everyone was walking on “pins and needles” now. Everyone was a lot more strict and mean. This new principal runied it for me at C-Train.

I got stuck with the oldest ugliest bitch in the entire school as my english teacher. Her name was Mrs. Judy Bateman. She was the devil in the flesh. I hated that woman with a passion that when I would sleep in her class I would actually have dreams of me pushing her down the stairwell or throwing her out the window. I also got stuck with a prick for my history class, Coach Fair. He thought that since he was the coach of the football team that he just ran that school. Which was bullshit. I hated that man so much, I think I actually hated him a little more than Mrs. Bateman. :]

I eventually dropped out of high school around the end of September. But before I dropped out, back in August I started dating this guy named Rob. I don’t really want to tell the whole story about him. If you want to know it, just email me or write me and I’ll tell you. It’s just that it’s so long and drawn out that it would be like another life story. But all of it in a nutshell, he was a prick. He used me to get what he wanted and as soon as he got it, he left. He hurt me in the biggest way that anyone could ever hurt me.

More drama got started between me and my friends and Shitty Kunt. But, luckily for me, I pulled myself out of it before I could ge all twisted up in it. Tasha ended up getting with Shitty’s ex and there was this big custody battle over their son and everything. I don’t know all the details. It was like this huge battle between all of my friends. I lost most of my friends from all of that. But I think I was better off without them.

In December of 2007 I started dating a guy, Johnathan, he and I were great for the first two months, but into the third month for some reason I didn’t really want to be with him anymore. For some reason I felt as if I lost all my feelings toward him. I don’t know why, and it wasn’t intentional. It’s just that things like that happen. I broke up with him by telling him I was moving to Charlotte to go to school and that I was going to be there for a good while. We are still friends.

On Februrary 22nd 2008 I was with a friend, we were driving down the road when we hit a van. I was thrown into the wind screen of the car and almost from the car completely. I almost died that night, and I couldn’t believe it. I walked away with a few bumps and bruises and some fractured places in my back and some shards of glass in my skull. Nothing really, serious.

That really opened my eyes as to see that you never know when you’re going to die. This made me value life a lot more than what I did. There were times that I sat here and wished I could have died and wished I could die and everything, but that nigth I got a pretty good idea of what dieing felt like. And, if thats how it really is when it happens… Then I’m so not ready to die.

This is my life story, so far. I’ve of course left out some major things, and some minor things. But if I give them all away now, then I have nothing left for the book or movie now do I? :] Below are some pictures of myself. Some of them are older pictures and some are newer.